the ch!cktionary

Overshare Thursdays

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 21:36:04 -0400

I am getting my period because I missed a pill. Crap. For the past two days, I thought my cramps were hunger pangs. WRONG.

This is the part where I look for a "patron".

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 20:14:32 -0400

Gracye: we're on! i know a cute cafe on newbury street. also, stephanie's and then shopping?
Me: WITH WHAT INCOME???
Gracye: Lena, you are an aspiring starving author. Aren't you supposed to live beyond your means?

Group photo from the Southeast Asia trip (taken in Hue,...

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 19:52:00 -0400

Group photo from the Southeast Asia trip (taken in Hue, Vietnam). Six of us, four countries, 16 days. I can’t wait to see the photos off of Patrick’s and his sister’s Leicas.

Because one can only post so many angry letters per day. Also, YAY I HAVE A HOME!

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 19:43:52 -0400

Dear Sexual Partner,

Thanks for going apartment viewing for me! That was kind and unnecessary, and I will dogsit eagerly and often in gratitude (and because Hamlet will now have a pal for company). I miss you and look forward to touching you inappropriately the second you pick me up at the airport next week. At 5am. Have I mentioned how much I love you?

P.S. I’m sure you’re thrilled that I now have my own place to trash.

Dear Westin Grand at Washington D.C.

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 18:13:48 -0400

Why has it taken three representatives and multiple return calls to make ONE booking that isn’t even on the weekend I originally requested? Why have you completely forgotten to make a note of the free breakfast included with my visit? And how did my three-night stay suddenly turn into a two-night stay on my supposedly final itinerary? WHY WON’T YOU RETURN MY CALLS?? You are incompetent, and if I didn’t have a gift certificate for a free visit, I would say “Fuck it” to your hotel after all the hassle you’ve put me through. FAIL.

[Christine, Daniel, and all else: expect less enraged, more fabulous me in D.C. from October 10th to 13th.]

Dear Internet Haters

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 20:45:03 -0400

When you leave persistent comments telling me to “watch where [I] walk” and saying that you’re going to send someone to “find” me, that’s harassment and it’s illegal. You should probably … I don’t know, stop?

It highly irritates me when I have a troll who is CLEARLY male and CLEARLY has no conception of how disturbing physical threats are to women. I don’t care if you call me a big slut or even insult my family, but c’mon, this is just being an asshole. Can ya chill out for a second, take a look at yourself, and actually think about what you’re writing? Who does this stuff?

"If it weren’t for Patrick, I have NO IDEA how I’d get around Boston. Or move, for that..."

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 19:57:00 -0400

“If it weren’t for Patrick, I have NO IDEA how I’d get around Boston. Or move, for that matter. Or … live. I think maybe before we dated, I just stayed within a comfortable, walkable 2-sq mile area. This is entirely possible.”

- Me, explaining my incredibly inconvenient lack of driving ability. Along with swimming skills, this is something I am determined to acquire within the year!

American Firsts

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 19:54:09 -0400

So despite owning an obscene number of shoes (34 pairs last time I counted) and despite 70% of these shoes being heels, I managed to pack only three pairs for summer and all of them were flats. Today I put on heels for the first time in MONTHS, and it was … precarious. Going to take some getting used to for sure. I better deal quick since I pretty much don’t have any other kind of footwear in Boston.

"You cannot be a feminist and oppose a woman’s right to choose.You can be a feminist and be..."

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 19:18:00 -0400

“You cannot be a feminist and oppose a woman’s right to choose.You can be a feminist and be uncomfortable with the notion of abortion. You can be a feminist and communicate that discomfort to third parties. You can be a feminist and choose never to have an abortion yourself. You can be a feminist and support greater rights and opportunities for young mothers everywhere so that fewer women will have to choose between pregnancy and their career. You can do all of these things and be a feminist. What you cannot do is stand in the way of any other woman’s moral and political right to reproductive self-determination.”

- Penny Red (via gauntlet)

As a woman who is a feminist and pro-choice, but who would most likely not choose to have an abortion herself, this statement makes a lot of sense to me.
(via amandine) (via sarahchristine) (via snickerdoodle)

Did AIM just break?

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 16:56:29 -0400

Fuck you, AOL. Fuck you. I actually needed to use instant messenger for professional purposes. Gchat it is.

OMG BERRYLINE IS HIRING AND I NEED A JOB! This must be a sign.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 16:04:00 -0400

OMG BERRYLINE IS HIRING AND I NEED A JOB! This must be a sign.: Unfortunately, I think it would only be a conflict of interest if I applied for a position at my favorite Harvard Square establishment. And by “conflict of interest”, I mean that I would clearly consume two liters of frozen yogurt a day if given the opportunity.

Re: Hamlet 2

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:43:00 -0400

youngmanhattanite:

bigcrush:

seriously guys, save yourselves. It is terrible.

blakeley:

Shitty movie, we all walked out

See, you really should have watched part one first. Otherwise it’s just confusing.

Said my friend, not joking: “Was there a Hamlet 1?”

Related stupidity here.

This is how a career dies young.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 12:37:00 -0400

Lena Chen: I'm blogging you. can i use your full name or just jason? my fucking chat transcript has you as jason burke all over
Jason Burke: wait, what are you blogging me saying?
Lena Chen: the dream
Jason Burke: oh, you can use my full name.
Lena Chen: but what if someone finds out you have dreams about the potential death of a sex blogger and they DONT HIRE YOU?
Jason Burke: yea, im not too worried abut that. i dont really care. unless i am saying something that you would judge to compromise my future.
Lena Chen: im pretty sure any and all association with me will compromise your future

And now a G-Chat convo illustrating why I miss my other best friend.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 12:33:45 -0400

Jason Burke: you need a life.
Jason Burke: jk!
Jason Burke: <3
Lena Chen: omg asshole
Jason Burke: i had the weirdest dream last night involving various men of yours.
Lena Chen: also, I HAD THE WEIRDEST DREAM INVOLVING VARIOUS MEN OF MINE
Jason Burke: so, you clearly remember [redacted]. that was his name, right?
Jason Burke: anyway, he tried to kill you, and i was there, and so he tried to kill me too.
Jason Burke: and basically patrick was forced into trying to prevent him from killing you.
Jason Burke: it was really sweet
Jason Burke: and scary
Jason Burke: anyway, what was your dream?
Jason Burke: hopefully it didn't involve attempted murder

Nothing like an old email from my sex-positive, militantly atheist best friend to make me miss her.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 07:58:00 -0400

From: Courtney Kennedy
To: Lena Chen
Date: Thu, Jul 17, 2008 at 6:05 AM
Subject: hey, you wanna…

start an atheistic anti-true love revolution club on campus? called the Order of the Goddess?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Invisible_Pink_Unicorn
http://www.palmyria.co.uk/humour/ipu.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flying_Spaghetti_Monster

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE????

WE NEED TO RAISE AWARENESS. Religion is dangerous and awful and so is this “movement.” We need something to counter this. DESPERATELY. I’m becoming more and more convinced that we need to be actively converting people to the side of atheism. Let’s go forth and proselytize!

Also I’ve already started packing. Woo hoo! And I just started crying because I really have accepted that Sascha is gone.

Also you had better say yes to this. It’s not really a request.

We can have a whole pantheon consisting of the flying spaghetti monster, the invisible pink unicorn, and Bertrand Russell’s teapot. And we can have teas! And discussions with religious groups on campus. And promote sexual promiscuity!

Also why are you never online? Do you hate me?

Current Facebook profile photo: Hamlet sticking up his adorable...

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 07:45:58 -0400

Current Facebook profile photo: Hamlet sticking up his adorable butt to take a sip from the lake in Boston’s Public Gardens. By the time I get back to the East, it will have been a MONTH since I’ve seen him. It’s our longest separation yet!

There's never time or place for what comes out of my mouth.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 04:53:00 -0400

Wesley (Evelina's boyfriend): What kind of yoga positions did you guys do?
Me: I don't know. Downward dog? Reverse cowgirl?
Couple in line with us bursts into laughter.
Me: I guess I said that kind of loudly.

Yawn.

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 04:48:46 -0400

Good news: I am no longer on German time!
Bad news: My sleeping schedule is somewhere mid-Atlantic right now. At this rate, I’m not going to make it to the Pacific timezone before I depart California in eight days.

I think middle-of-the-night phone calls are to blame. When he was still in Germany, I gave Patrick a free pass to call me whenever, a stupid move I attribute to 1) missing him a lot and 2) severely underestimating how much this would extend my jetlag. I would say the weird sleep is a symptom of the Southeast Asia trip alone but it’s pretty telling that Patrick (in Boston) and I (in Los Angeles) both passed out within an hour of each other earlier this evening … though his 8pm was much more reasonable than my 5pm here. I suspect I’ll be on Patrick Daylight Time (PDT) until I get to Boston, where I’ll probably skip over Eastern time altogether and arrive at Pacific. Figures!

Have you ever applied for a job just for the perks?

Tue, 02 Sep 2008 17:44:00 -0400

Because that’s what I’m doing right now. I’m targeting Boston-area bookstores and gyms, since I want discounts at the former and membership in the latter. At the very least, I’ll be incredibly well-read or in shape?

(I also want to be a dogwalker, but I imagine that’s not the most reliable income source.)

To Go List

Tue, 02 Sep 2008 04:17:00 -0400

Since I’ve been talking to my mother a lot about traveling next year during my time off Harvard …

Domestic

Chicago - Nearly went to college at Northwestern, but got in early to Harvard so I never made my spring break visit. Have wanted to see Chicago ever since.
Portland - Have never been to Oregon despite living on the West Coast my entire life. Time to amend that!
Providence - Just a super short train ride from Boston but I’ve never managed to make the day trip. Maybe when my little sister does her college hunting, I’ll take her to Brown?
Seattle - Went once I was 17 for a journalism conference. Thought it was gorgeous but my status as a minor obviously prevented me from fully enjoying the city. Dying to go back. It’s too bad Kennedy left for Colorado instead of sticking around.

International

Asia
- Cambodia - If I do Angkor Homestay
- China - Been to Hong Kong thrice but never Beijing or Shanghai
- India
- Indonesia - Jakarta, mostly
- Singapore - Have wanted to go to Singapore for years
- Taiwan - My cousin is living in Taipei for the next couple years
- Thailand again - Because there’s so much left to see besides Bangkok
Middle East
- Dubai
- … and pretty much ANYWHERE else there
Europe (all remainders from this summer)
- Paris
- Prague
- Venice
- Vienna

It’s time to save like mad. I’m working all fall in Boston, placing myself on a shopping moratorium, and getting a piggy bank. Oh, the places I hope to go!